vash Admin
Number of posts : 760 Age : 34 Location : Brampton ON Registration date : 2007-12-04
| Subject: Is it against Gods Rule to date a Non-virgin? Thu Dec 06, 2007 2:45 pm | |
| I've heard a lot of Christians say that dating someone who isn't a virgin is bad and against what God teaches (still kinda looking for that in the Bible). They say you're not the same and that person has lost their purity in the eyes of God and can never get it back and that your wedding night will be horrible and a whole mess of things.
Does anyone else agree? Dating a non-virgin is something that God doesn't allow? | |
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cpowanab7 Specialist
Number of posts : 166 Age : 35 Location : Orlando, FL, USA Registration date : 2007-12-06
| Subject: Re: Is it against Gods Rule to date a Non-virgin? Thu Dec 06, 2007 3:59 pm | |
| Okay, here's my take on the situation. I know a few guys that have had sex already. But it was before they were saved and made a commitment to God. They are now saved and committed, living everyday for God. Now them having sex just doesn't disappear, but they repented for it, and it has now become part of their testimony. They are disgusted by the fact that they did, but what happened happened. One of them will be marrying soon and has had to share his testimony with his fiance'.
The reason why some may think that the wedding night will be horrible and what not is because one, the person that is a virgin might not have forgiven the one who had and in turn that's all they're focusing on that night.
Now another, you know when you take two sheets of construction paper and glue them together, let it dry, then you try to take them apart? What happens? pieces or may be even chunks of paper get stuck on the other leaving holes, scratches, and scars. This is the same thing that happens to our hearts when we (as christians) date or do whatever else with nonsaved people, we join together or ("glue our hearts together") and then when something bad happens and the couple splits, they're taking a part of your heart (another comparison is a pie, they're taking a slice of your pie/heart). What most churches don't focus on is restoring the person and become healed of the relationship. We need to pray to God to have his Spirit fill their heart back up, have it renewed, restored. Now, if the person keeps doing it to themselves and hopping from relationship to relationship, then that's a whole other teaching I could go off of haha.
hope this answers your questions!! | |
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justin Super Moderator
Number of posts : 61 Location : in a van, down by the river Registration date : 2007-12-05
| Subject: Re: Is it against Gods Rule to date a Non-virgin? Fri Dec 07, 2007 12:38 am | |
| Some may try to take Old Testament laws and try to make them apply to this situation. doesn' work. Not that the old laws of Moses were bad but the thinking behind that was changed when Jesus came to earth in the flesh. Having sex before marriage is a sin. Sin creates separation from God. Admit and ask forgiveness for that sin and god forgets. That is all (almost). Everyone sins; it's our nature. It doesn't make sense to judge someone for a certain sin - or judge someone at all. If you were to use that theory to find someone to date then every chick out there would be eliminated because they've all sinned. Her losing her virginity is no different than some sins you might commit. Now there is baggage to carry when you have sex b4 marriage. Guilt is a hard one to carry and to get rid of. Unless the list is long, u will always remember the people u have hooked up with. God "made" sex especially for marriage and it's a big part in the "joining together" part of marriage. Sometimes it's hard to get over that. God is awesome though. don't let something like that keep u from maybe finding the on He has 4 u. by the way - I'm married, have a 4year old and another anytime now. I have a little experience with this situation. I also dated a lot of chicks in my day. not braggin, but pimpin ain't easy. | |
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AlanC Private (Recruit)
Number of posts : 5 Registration date : 2007-12-06
| Subject: Re: Is it against Gods Rule to date a Non-virgin? Thu Dec 13, 2007 9:31 am | |
| If the non-virgin is saved and has repented, he/she is forgiven and washed in the Blood of Jesus, so there is nothing wrong with dating him/her unless that person remains in there sin and continues to have sex before marriage, in that case they shouldn't be dated because they will probably take you down with them no matter how strong you think you may be. | |
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vash Admin
Number of posts : 760 Age : 34 Location : Brampton ON Registration date : 2007-12-04
| Subject: Re: Is it against Gods Rule to date a Non-virgin? Thu Dec 13, 2007 9:04 pm | |
| I agree with you Alan, couldn't have said it any better Yeah, temptation is something all of us struggle with, its just our nature of things. Exactly what you said Alan, if the girl you are with, continues to have premartial sex, then its definitely not somebody you'd want to get involved with "relationship" wise, that doesn't mean treat the person badly. Its just better not to test you temptation, and stay away from it. Perhaps talking with the person would even shed some light on them and help them realizing what they are doing is wrong, and that forgiveness is there if they truely want it | |
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